It is important to normalize feelings of anxiety at the start of the new school year. The combination of excitement and fear are extremely common for children and adults as they enter new situations.
Anxiety in children can be eased through preparation for the beginning of the school year. This preparation can look like frequent trips to the school building or playground, and attending open houses before the school year starts to meet teachers and see their classrooms.
For children with more severe anxiety consider contacting the child's teacher to let them know that the child is particularly uneasy about the start of the new year. Inquire about a time where the child can visit the classroom and teacher to help with a small chore or task while getting to know them in a smaller setting. In addition, consider introducing the child early to their new before- and after-school routine, including car-rider pickup or riding the bus.
Support, conversation and encouragement can also ease anxiety that carries into the first few weeks of school. Parents may wish to send the child a special note in their bag or their lunch box letting them know that they are always thinking of them.
Sometimes children, with or without anxiety can struggle to express their experiences from their day. It can be helpful for parents to ask specific questions that trigger their child's memory regarding those experiences. For example, parents could ask, “what did you like about the lunch options,” “what was your favorite toy on the playground,” or “what was something fun you learned today during art or reading.”
During these conversations, parents can help normalize feelings of anxiety in new situations. Children have limited insight into their feelings sometimes and may not be able to clearly express what they are feeling and/or experiencing. Many of the child’s classmates are likely having similar experiences. Sharing this can minimize feelings of isolation anxiety can create.
Anxiety across the age range can manifest in many ways including, stomach aches, headaches, avoidance behaviors and out right refusal or oppositional responses. Parents are encouraged to listen to their child’s report of how they are feeling and what they are worried about. Acknowledge the child’s worry with validating responses, such as,” I understand that this is a new school, and you are not sure who is going to be in your class and that makes you feel anxious about going to school”. This validation, even if the worry seems irrational, will build trust for sharing future feelings and concerns. (i.e. child expresses fear that their parent will not pick them up, etc.). When appropriate, parents can offer a plan to address communicated fears and feelings.
School counselors are an excellent resource for parents whose children have severe school anxiety. Reach out to discuss available strategies and possibilities to support your child to develop a positive view of education or work to reframe previous negative experiences at school.
Parents can also experience a great deal of anxiety as their child starts school.
This is often the case when a child starts kindergarten, if their children have significant behavioral or developmental needs, or if the parent themselves carry previous negative school experiences. In addition, back-to-school is an extremely busy time of the year for families and stress can be quite high already.
Children are highly perceptive of parent and caregiver anxiety and stress. It is vital for parents to remain calm to demonstrate composed behavior, especially in school environments. To help further foster a positive educational experience and minimize anxiety, it is important to refrain from making disparaging remarks in front of your child about the staff, building, or your child’s teacher. When children perceive that their parent does not like a situation, they may start to internalize negative feelings about their school and anxiety will climb.
There are many resources available to parents and caregivers that address anxiety, depression and other feelings and emotions that impact children. Taking advantage of available resources and remaining connected to the child can create an environment where a positive school experience can be fostered.
Please visit and utilize some of those resources below:
Anxiety: Helping Handout for School and Home National Association of School Psychologists. (www.nasponline.org/HHportal)
